Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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