you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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