i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize