I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Randomize
