I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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