the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Randomize
