PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
