did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
Randomize