Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
