I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize