"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Randomize
