Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Randomize
