We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Randomize
