i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
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