actually, I'm a sock model
U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize