You made me cry and you don't even care
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
drinking out of a sandbucket again
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
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