i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Randomize