I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
Randomize
