at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
Randomize
