K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Randomize
