we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
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