i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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