Dual....:-)
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Randomize
