Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Randomize
