I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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