I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
