If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
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