If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
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