What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Randomize
