I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
