YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
apparently, "please pick me up from the airport" also means "i got drunk on the flight and need to give you roadhead in broad daylight"
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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