Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Randomize
