So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Randomize
