Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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