and my herpes radar will keep us safe
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Randomize