He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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