This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Randomize
