I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
These tits shall not be calmed
Randomize
