I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
