Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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