he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
