She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
We need to feng shui this bitch.
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