hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
Randomize
