weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
