Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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