i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Randomize
