Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I am never drinking with the goths again.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
