Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
