This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Randomize
