Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
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