Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
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